So I thought we were back to the ignoring until Wednesday evening. You replied a day’s old text suddenly and actually kept the conversation going from there. Smiley faces, playing along with my avengers references and even coming out to hang with Nat and I even thought the next day you had to be at the airport. You were surprisingly nice to us that day and it was nice to finally this side of you again. I really thought I wouldn’t have any chance to see you before NS but you proved me wrong. You even called me at midnight and chatted with me until 3AM, even if the last half an hour was pretty much spent waking you up.
I have foolish daydreams of meadows and cake and icing, sundresses and silk shirts, sandals and picnic baskets. Sharing ear buds and falling asleep by the beach (of course, this isn’t going to happen in Singapore the beach is far too crowded and the water way too disgusting). If that can’t work then jumping onto the couch and watching movies whilst eating chocolate and going out for a nice little dinner or a walk around the neighbourhood. I would dream that for once our late nights would go my way and we’d lay on the floor of my bed room and listen to music as we talked or I ranted.
I’m scared of what I’ll be like when the day finally comes. How will I react? Will I finally cry over something of this sort or will I remain behind a smile and tell him to hurry and get his ass in camp then later regret we didn’t share a last memory together. I will never know but it’s going to happen soon. I’m grateful that you get to come home everyday from NS because you don’t have to go for BMT but an 18 year old’s nightlife is probably much busier than a 15 year old’s one. I’m not surprised if the next time we actually go to the park for a chat is next year.
Will you miss me? ‘Cos I am sure as hell missing you already.