Judging you, judging me.

by arishaaar

I’m sorry I can’t be perfect.

I know that everyone at one point in their lives will be judged for their looks, the things they have done or are doing. Society will judge. But the most common victims seem to be teenagers being judged by teenagers. There isn’t a time when we are never judged. We are being judged in terms of the petty little things like appearance, fashion sense, height, weight, the material things other than clothes like phones, houses, our friends sometimes, our partner if we so happen to have one. The adults judge us academically, talents, behaviour, mannerism, physical appearance as well.

Now if you come from a “Prestigious” school like me (that’s what they say. I don’t find it high up at all), you would be able to sympathize with me when I say our skirt length, our socks, our belt, our hair, shoes, our badge, our PE shirt are all scrutinized as well. Just today, we had one of our dreaded spot checks of the week and a prefect came up to me, measured my skirt and told me my skirt was 9cm above my knee, 2cm too short. I have never EVER been called out for anything before. NEVER. I was extremely shocked and quickly told her as sincerely as I could that I will change it. But noooo, she said she had to book me without giving me any chances to go and get a new one over the weekend. My teacher rescued me though as she was already rather annoyed at other prefects calling out girls with obviously acceptable skirts and booking them (but failing of course because of my teachers). I was pretty annoyed by that prefect (no I am annoyed at Tieh but that’s a different thing).

So later I became a little self-concious of my skirt length and could feel it brushing the back f my leg ever so slightly and I would instinctively pull it down. Those girls in my class who are regularly booked for this kind of thing are equally astonished at the prefect wanting to book me and were re-assuring me that it was fine although maybe it was a little short and needed to be measured just to be sure. However, one girl told me it was short and walked off with the “if her skirt is so short, mine can be as well. This is so unfair.” look. When my literature teacher nagged me to stop copying the question on the board (I had no idea it was on a different page) she looked at me with the “god she’s weird.” look.

I just hate being judged. Nobody does. But if I think about it, without judgement in the world, a lot of things would have gone haywire. I guess the world could do with a little less strict criticism of these petty things.